Photo: Contributed
By Donna Fairhurst
I come to you from the unceded territory of the Syilx and Okanagan people with gratitude for your lessons and the powerful teachings coming forth in this challenging time. I am so grateful for the soulful lessons we are sharing with each other today.
What is forgiveness?
Forgiveness is the gift we give ourselves that empowers us and others to see ourselves through our hearts and Creator’s eyes. It is the result of suspending judgment, remorse, guilt, shame, blame and fear to live in, and from, the centre of our sacred soul or self.
Why is it necessary?
This is necessary for the evolution of all levels of human consciousness and thus affects all equally, mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually.
How do we start?
True spiritual growth and freedom can only be attained by embracing forgiveness as an action plan on every level of your being. As humans we tend to judge all things, both consciously and unconsciously.
Where does it lead us?
Many people do not see the pathway to love is forgiveness. Lack of forgiveness is ego or brain based, even if it feels that our heart might be breaking. In actual fact the feeling of a broken heart, for any reason, is the first indication that radical forgiveness is required.
What actions define forgiveness?
When we are hurt, whether we acknowledge it or not, the only way forward is through forgiveness. If we are locked into judgment, validation of our pain, or punishing a person, a place or situation, we are energetically cording to the very pain we don’t want to feel. It is a negative energy loop we can only cut or dissolve with love and forgiveness.
What is not necessary to embrace to forgive?
When we realize that it is not necessary to condone the action that has brought us pain, we can choose to take action to come to a place of peace, calm and forgiveness. That means fully accepting that you cannot change what is past, embracing where you are, and setting a clear intention and vision of where you intend to be.
Repeat after me:
“I acknowledge that harbouring resentment blocks the flow of love.”
What is the gift in forgiving?
When you do that you stop identifying with your pain or problem and start identifying with the solution. The solution is always to choose you in your highest level of awareness, accept your emotions as a call to action, and then take action with the powers love or grace. Remember that when you cannot feel love for the person, place or situation, you are the prisoner and the jailor. You have the power to access grace. It is your “get out of jail free” card.
9 Keys for Radical Forgiveness
1. Remember that we are infinite souls, born of love, to express love and to infinite love we return always.
2. Judgment always results in chaos and incoherence, and forgiveness always results in calm and coherence.
3. Forgiveness is always heart based. Lack of it comes from judgment and ego.
4. When you label something, good, bad, indifferent or anything else, you negate it. It just “is now.” You created this experience to learn from it. What are you learning?
5. You can forgive without forgetting the lesson you learned in the process or staying stuck in a memory. It’s an inside job .
6. Don’t dwell in drama. All judgment comes from drama. Get still, centred, grounded, focused and act.
7. Forgiveness releases endorphins in our bodies that allow us to free the ego, and live from heart to create and embrace hope, joy, love, grace and freedom.
8. It’s all about you, not the person, place, thing or situation you are judging. Get over it, and get on with it. If you are dealing with trauma, deal with it. Take the steps, access the resources available to you, get the counselling you need, and find a coach who resonates with your energy to help you. Staying put means staying stuck.
9. Don’t let judgment ground you. We are born to fly! Forgiveness strengthens our spiritual wings, so that we may know more, grow more, flow more and glow more.
Homework: Acknowledge that harbouring forgiveness and resentment blocks the flow of love. Today forgive one person, or situation. Open your heart to that person and release the unnecessary suffering from the past. Feel the peace that follows from this simple act.
Donna Fairhurst is the owner of Donna Fairhurst Co. in Penticton.
This column was submitted as part of BWB Wednesdays.
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