By Sharon Davison
Money is the last taboo. Try talking to someone about what they make, what they owe, or what savings they have or hope to have, and you will likely be met with a range of reactions or emotions. Ask them how their relationship with money is, and you might get a blank stare. We don’t want to talk about it and we don’t want to look too deeply, and yet we often want our relationship with money to be different in some way. Can you relate? Imagine for a moment that you are in a relationship with money. How would you describe that? Is it magical and transformative, tight and controlled, empowering and an adventure, or depleted and desperate? What kind of relationship would you like to have?
Psychologists know that struggles, conflicts and core issues around money have a great impact on our psyche, relationships and all aspects of self. The power of early experiences and deeply held beliefs about money, which are often inherited or learned early in life, is a foundation that our future relationship with money is built upon. When we are not happy in that relationship, taking some time to uncover this foundation can be the starting point to understanding and making change. Reconstructing a financial life through a more wholistic perspective can provide a healthy ground for new patterns, actions and money experiences.
With interest in law of attraction, neuroeconomics, neuroscience, the increasing numbers of people retiring, and the largest transference of money from one generation to another, there are many approaches for how to work with and relate to your money. One emerging field is that of money coaching. Rather than a traditional approach that might focus on planning investments, creating debt repayment or setting up savings plans, money coaching looks at your relationship with money through the perspective of wholistic well-being to live fully and abundantly in all areas of your life.
Like humans, money is both physical and spiritual in its form. It is energy. Money has the ability to bring us great good or great suffering, depending how we relate and work with it. An unconscious and unhealthy relationship can bring about personal and societal problems. Often what we think, feel and do with money is passed to us unconsciously and so we don’t know that we are not making our own choices and decisions but are being driven by patterns that are inherited and learned when our brains are young and absorbing everything around us. Despite our best efforts we may one day realize something is not working and want to examine what is impacting this relationship, rather than once again looking for another some “thing” to fill a void or believing we are “no-thing” without money and our material possessions. From a wholistic perspective we are physical, mental, emotional and spiritual beings; when integrated we are a healthy individual. At our core is a presence and awareness that unites all aspects of our self and is the source of all.
In the relationship with money and the physical self, it is important to know if our basic needs are being met, how much money do we or do we not have, and if our wants are being materialized. Mentally, we can look at what beliefs we have about money, what thought patterns repeat, and if we understand the influence that reactions have on our brain and body. Emotionally, we begin noticing what feelings and emotional energy patterns are present around money, what money memories are connected to our emotions, and what supports our current money relationship? Spiritually, we begin identifying the universal archetypes that show up in our life, any meaning and purpose connected to our money, and if there is an open flowing of intuition and spirit into our material world. We are connected spiritual human animals with a brain that reflects these aspects and their integration.
Science tells us that reality is not how we think it is and that our experience is influenced by other factors as part of a fabric of life interacting with itself. Better understanding of what blocks or conditions our experiences with money is important work for our times as we face economic uncertainty, fear in the world and a society extending itself into consumerism for meaning, value and self worth. You were not born to shop! It may be part of what you enjoy but it was never the purpose of being alive. Our purpose is not just to survive but to realize our potential and bring it into the material world. This truly is a rich life. You already have everything you need from source; you just need to move past the obstacles to manifesting and living it well. This is the work of money coaching.
Working with a money coach you will uncover core patterns and beliefs around money, you will understand personal energies and behaviours that are inherited, you will work with universal forms and language related to money, and you will identify living assets and purpose for living a life connected to source. You will identify where it is you are, where it is you want to be and begin that journey. Having a harmonious relationship with your finances is part of the mind/body/spirit connection for living a balanced and healthy life. Money coaching work can stand alone, or it can work well in tandem with traditional money professionals such as financial planners, advisor or debt consolidators and counsellors.
A journey such as this not only assists one in changing their relationship with money; it develops the ability for us to increase awareness, set intension, unlock potential and take action with purpose.
This blueprint can be applied to any aspect of living a conscious life of richness and meaning.
This column was submitted as part of BWB Well-Being Wednesdays.
All Columnists Stories